Tips for Balancing Work and Children

August 28, 2010 - Carol McBee

Following are some tips to assist you in achieving a happy balance between your work and home life, but if you’re willing to change your job, you could look for an employer known for their family-friendly policies. Today’s Parent magazine offers an annual list of the top ten family-friendly employers.  These companies make the grade for offering benefits such as subsidized daycare, maternity or paternity top up, scholarship programs, flexible work arrangements, and even adoption funding.

• Have a backup plan.  There will be nights when you have to work late, or days when your child is sick.  Have a backup plan for a family member or friend (be sure to arrange ahead of time for this individual to have permission) to pick the child up from daycare or school and stay with them.  When your child is sick, see if you can work from home, or have a friend or relative who can accommodate your sick child on short notice if you cannot leave work.
• Stay organized.  A large, decorative square basket sits in the corner of the kitchen, collecting newspapers so they don’t clutter the kitchen table all week.  Grab and go snacks fill a designated drawer in the pantry to reduce time rummaging for something to throw in the lunch bags.  Labeled bins by the front door hold hats, gloves, outdoor toys and shoe cleaning supplies.  Where do you lose time everyday?  Where does your frustration level start to rise?  Organize your home to speed up the routine tasks so you can slow down and enjoy the fun stuff.
• Ask for help.  Even a three-year-old can pick up their toys or grab themselves a snack of yogurt and an apple.  If you have children old enough to do chores, determine what needs to be done and who (other than you) could be doing it.  This teaches invaluable lessons about responsibility and household contributions.  Don’t expect or wait for help to be offered – ask for it!  Children even younger than three may be able to help with some tasks – just expect it to take a little longer.  “From the time my children were five-years-old they helped me bake and prepare meals.  By the time Jack was 10, he was making homemade pizza for dinner once a week.  Laura has been making quiche since she was nine. It’s great knowing that once or twice a week, I don’t have to cook dinner.”  Joan, mom of two. Keep in mind that sometimes little helping hands can create more work than they complete – plan what they help with accordingly!
• Be prepared.  You know mornings are hectic, so get things ready the night before.  Ask the kids to choose their breakfast cereal and put out bowls and spoons.  Make their lunches with them (also a great way to encourage eating those lunches).  Try meal planning – it saves time and money.
• Say no. Establish your priorities.  Create goals and only agree to things that match those goals. Is your goal to spend more time with your kids?  Skip the drinks after work.  Trying to carve out time for yourself?  Committing to things you don’t want to do leads to stress and feelings of hostility.  And while saying no means that the individual requesting your time will be disappointed initially, they’ll find someone else who can do whatever it is they were asking you to do.  If you take the non-confrontational route and cancel at the last minute, it’s a major blow to their project or feelings.  Write down important events in your children’s lives (school plays, church concerts) and treat them with the reverence they deserve, working your job around them.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff.  You’ve got an hour.  Do you spend it dusting, or baking cookies with your daughter?  (They don’t have to be from scratch – boxed mixes count!)  Do you go out to the backyard to play in the sand with your son, or scrub the bathroom? Sometimes, the right thing to do is to ignore the dust and leave the dishes in the sink overnight.  There will always be plenty of chores and responsibilities, so relax your standards on the things you “should” do.

Sarah Deveau is a mom of three, and the author of Money Smart Mom: Financially Fit Parenting. Visit her website at www.moneysmartmom.ca or pick up her book from Chapters Indigo.

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